I may be a whore but at least I get paid

That's right bitches, people are paying me to advertise on my blog. I have officially whored out so I guess I had better start saying some inflammatory, yet funny things, eh?

Today's topic was supposed to be about fate vs. control, but that's far too deep for the ole grey matter today. Instead, I will tackle a far more simple topic: Employment.

As you may (or may not) know (or care) I have officially joined the ranks of the unemployed. My story is the typical one--It was a difficult decision the company had to make, but I was restructured out of my job to make room for like, growth or whatever.

This is actually not a big deal to me--truly. Business is business, and they had to make some tough choices, which I get. I have been able to spend some priceless time with my son, and completely annhilate any semblance of dust that may or may not have existed in our home. It's been cathardic and a learning experience, to say the least. But I digress.

As an official member of the unemployed in Michigan, and a collector of the unemployment benefit, I had to register with Michigan Works and promise to be actively looking for work. I have some pretty fierce numbers working against me in this system. The current unemployment rate in Michigan, according to the Bureau of Labor and Statistics is 13.6%. Michigan Works has 24,813 jobs available in their talent bank--something that every person receiving unemployment benefits is required to "participate" in. I suck at math, and have the 4 College Algebra classes under my belt to prove it, but I realize that with a population just shy of 10 million, 24,813 jobs will not cover the 130,000+ unemployed people in the State.

However, the first thing these numbers lead me to ask is, 'with that many unemployed people in the State, how are there that many job openings? Surely, there must be some qualified workers to fill the 24,000+ jobs open in the State, right?'

Apparently not.

I got a guy on the inside of Michigan works who said the chief complaint on the inside is that the employers are being extremely picky and difficult to work with in terms of placing people. I mean they can afford to be, right? With that kind of applicant pool, why should they have to settle, or I don't know, use common curtesies such as returning phone calls, sending rejection letters, etc.

What's more, a friend brought to my attention that some employers actually even state in their job postings that 'your application will not be considered if you are not currently employed.' I thought that is far too outlandish for the upstanding businesses that have graced our State, but alas, how wrong I was. Yes, I too, have seen these postings with my own eyes.

All I can say is: really, employers? Really??? Is your faith and perception in the quality of the Michigan workforce so jaded that you can't even consider people like myself, or thousands of others who have fallen prey to restructuring? Really? Hiring people, were you band geeks in high school that were the butt of most poplular kids jokes, and now you want to take it out on someone else? Yeah, I get it 'ha-ha you don't have a job, you suck!' That's great. Why don't you pick on people for having dead parents, or cancer, or a disability while you're at it, too.

Yeah yeah, it's a primarily untrained workforce that used to make $30/ hour to inspect bumpers for dings in them, but has no qualifications to do what it is that you do. But you can't tell me that out of the hundreds of thousands of chaps out there sans paycheck, that you can't find someone you can at least work with. I mean, we aren't poo-flinging monkeys for the love of Pete.

What a bunch of douche bags. No wonder i have whore myself out in blogs for pennies.

I'm juuuust sayin'